November 2025. Shallowford House Conference Centre.
The conference was beautifully facilitated by Joy and Rosie, co-leads of Creative Calm https://www.facebook.com/p/Creative-Calm-61576083088661/ sharing their expertise and lived experience as foster and adoptive parents.
Jackie Davies, a Methodist local church worker and adoptive parent lead our times of prayerful reflection.
107 children come into care every day (bearing in mind that the threshold for this is very high) this statistic that framed our time together. Realistically, most churches will have someone with personal or close connection to current or historic experience of being part of families that include fostered or adopted children.
Trauma has lasting impact on behaviour, relationships, emotions, learning, focus, long-term future outcomes. Looked after children have experienced trauma and many are neurodiverse. Exploring with parents and carers what each child needs to feel safe in the context will help and being aware of their stress responses. Always remember that we do not know the child’s story and need to ask open questions to find out how we can make church and church activities accessible for each child, and what it would be helpful for us to know as we seek to serve them.
Churches can offer support through growing whole congregation awareness and understanding (training, sermons etc), giving practical support (meals, vouchers for days out with children, self-care for parents etc), adjusting language to reflect that not all families are biological, praying and above all through being open to adjusting and changing how they do church. Churches can be a key part of ‘the village’ supporting families raising fostered and adopted children.
Home for Good and Safe Families have merged – safe families helping churches engage with vulnerable families to provide support to help prevent children going into care https://homeforgood.org.uk TLG also working in this space https://www.tlg.org.uk/your-church
Trauma Informed Churches – helpful organisation https://www.traumainformedchurches.org
Children’s Ministry Network recognised the role they can play in sharing the wider message that these families exist, will be in your church and need appropriate support and welcome – bringing adopting and fostering into conversation of church life.
Children’s Ministry Network 